Monday, May 16, 2011

What Would Really Change?

The other day I was feeling a little down. I’m not where I thought I would be in this stage in life and everything seems to be going the opposite of the way I want it to go. Of course I have a good portion of health and strength, I wake up in the morning clothed in my right mind and I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back etc. But when you’re feeling down those aren’t the kind of things that you focus on, you’re thinking about all the things that are going wrong.

We spend a lot of time thinking about how we would rather have something different than what we have. The curly haired people want straight hair so they’re getting relaxers and the super straight haired  people are getting curly perms. The dark skinned people want lighter skin and the white people are spending tons of time and money in tanning salons.  The overweight people are getting gastric bypass and the girls with no booty or boobs are getting plastic surgery.

Then I thought to myself if I made some of these changes that cross my mind what would really be different? If I had a donk like Trina what would really change in my everyday life? More men staring at my backside? If I had lighter skin or straight hair what would that change? If I had Oprah money how much would different would my life be? I thought if I woke up tomorrow morning with all of these changes (like how that sometimes happens in movies) would it be a fabulous wonderful change or would I feel like I was happier the way I was.

I’d still be me with the same family same friends. I would still wake up with morning breath and hair all over my head. I’d still go to my local Starbucks and get a Doubleshot everyday. Sure I could buy all the things that I wanted, travel the world, hire some help, eat at the best restaurants, and live the life of my dreams but would all of that change who I am? No matter what I look like or how much money I have I can’t change what’s done in the past or my regrets in life. It wouldn’t bring back the people that were near and dear to me that passed away.

All that said I know I need to count my blessings and focus on the things I can change instead of the things that I can’t change. But damn if it ain’t hard to do that sometimes.

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